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How a network of principals provides support for school shooting survivors

SCOTT DETROW, HOST:

The faculty of Apalachee High School in Winder, Ga., joined a group this week that no one wants to be in, the ever-growing group of school principals, teachers and administrators who've experienced a mass shooting. There is a network in place to help them out, a network that, sadly, has a lot of experience talking to people who have been in the exact same position.

The Principal Recovery Network was founded in 2019 by Frank DeAngelis and others. DeAngelis was principal of Columbine High School in 1999, when two students opened fire and killed more than a dozen people. He joins us now. Frank DeAngelis, welcome to ALL THINGS CONSIDERED.

FRANK DEANGELIS: Thank you so much for having me.

DETROW: You know, we talked to you a few years ago after the Uvalde shootings, and you said that every time you see the headline, you get the text alert about another school shooting, it just brings it all back. I imagine happened again this week for you.

DEANGELIS: Yes. It was really strange because it's been a tough year for me. I've had some health issues. And I usually talk to my counselor, and I've been in counseling since the Columbine tragedy happened. And I had not talked to him in a while, so I had set up an appointment. And I was actually in his office, and he helped me greatly.

And as I come down the stairs to leave his office, my phone's just starting - is - basically exploding with text messages. Are you aware of what's happening? Are you aware? And then phone calls, media calls - and I knew that there was another school shooting. And it does - it takes you back. And for us, it's been over 25 years, but there's certain things that trigger, you know, these emotions when these events happen. And it does.

DETROW: Yeah. You know, we see it in so many different ways, the way that after a shooting, the media conversation, the political conversation can go several different directions. And I'm wondering. For you personally, what are the things that you are thinking about in the days, in the weeks like we've yet again just had?

DEANGELIS: I am not looking at the political things because I just had this conversation with someone. The kids that lost their lives, the teachers, they're not going to have Republican or Democrat on their caskets. You know, I look at it from the standpoint that they're are all of our kids.

And right away, I start thinking about the recovery piece - next steps - because I can remember when Columbine happened on April 20 in '99, it was a couple of days afterwards, and I received a phone call from a gentleman named Bill Bond. And he was a principal at Heath High School in Paducah, Ky., when his event happened in 1997. And he made a comment to me that still resonates today. He said - he told me who he was, and he said, you don't even know what you need, but here's my number.

And he was exactly right, and I called him. And I can remember after receiving that call, I said, I just hope that I never have to make the call that Bill did. And well, unfortunately, since Columbine, I've made it numerous times.

DETROW: So you've, like you said, been through these paces so many times and to the point where the Principal Recovery Network has put together a guide for principals of what to do next. If your school has had a shooting like this, can you tell us what the first wave of top priorities are for administrators at Apalachee High School right now?

DEANGELIS: My first thing, when I make a phone call, as I've done over the years, the first thing I ask is, what are you doing? Take care of yourself. Because right now, the principal and the others that are there just feel the need to take care of everyone else. And then the second piece is stating you're not in this journey alone. The most difficult challenge is keeping everyone together. We can all experience the same event, but how we deal with it, we deal with it differently. And I think that was one of my most difficult things.

And I used to share, you know, when a family goes through a tragedy, we need to come together. And that was the most important thing. And I think that's a key message to them that they're not in this journey alone. And, you know, the other message, I think so many people wonder is, when is it going to get back to normal? And you really have to redefine what normal is, and people don't want to hear that.

DETROW: So there's the help that people like you can give - that unique experience, reaching out, giving advice, having been there before. What do you think this community needs from the rest of us, whether it's people who live directly in their community or elsewhere in the country? What's the best way to be supported when you've gone through a terrible experience like this. You see all the media cameras show up. Your friends have died. You're scared to go back to school, but you've got to continue your education and get back into it at some point.

DEANGELIS: Right. Right. And I think just reaching out and - I think a phrase - a lot of times people don't understand what to say. And sometimes it's just better to be quiet at a standpoint just to offer support because I know what was a trigger for so many of our people or staff is when people came up and says, I know what you're feeling. They're saying, oh, really? Were you locked in a classroom? Or did your best friend just die? And it's very difficult not knowing what to say but just offering that support and reaching out.

And I think the other thing, too, is their school year just started. And so they really have, you know, eight or nine more months before, you know, the end of the school year. And for us, we were at a point that we were exactly one month away - well, a little over a month from the seniors graduating and then about five weeks from school being dismissed. And so we had summer, you know, to kind of regroup. And - but we also had to provide hope or support for those people. But it's going to be difficult going back in right now.

I can remember when we came back to Columbine to start the new school year, there would be flowers and teddy bears, and a lot of times, when people would walk through those doors, it constantly reminded them of what had happened. And I think things, simple things like that - and there were so many people that wanted to be helpful. And originally, we put all these signs down the hallways, and students came to me and said, Mr. D, we appreciate the support of everyone, but it's constantly reminding us what happened. And so I think you got to be aware of, even though you feel you're helping, there's certain things that trigger the emotions of people within your building.

DETROW: That's Frank DeAngelis, the former principal of Columbine High School and a member of the Principal Recovery Network. Thanks so much for talking to us about this.

DEANGELIS: Thank you so much. Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.

NPR transcripts are created on a rush deadline by an NPR contractor. This text may not be in its final form and may be updated or revised in the future. Accuracy and availability may vary. The authoritative record of NPR’s programming is the audio record.

Scott Detrow is a White House correspondent for NPR and co-hosts the NPR Politics Podcast.